Silent “East-Asian Tears" - STRATUM Journal
In many East Asian families, two things remain remarkably scarce.
One is the phrase “I’m sorry.” The other is tears.
They are not absent. They are simply swallowed. Tears are pushed back down the throat. Apologies are withheld before they can form. Over time, both harden into the same dull ache, a pressure that settles somewhere in the chest and stays there for years. It does not always announce itself dramatically. Most of the time, it lingers as something quieter and more difficult to name.
This is part of why family pain in East Asian contexts can be so difficult to describe. It is not always explosive. It is not always visible. It often leaves no single scene that can be cleanly pointed to as the source of injury. Instead, it accumulates through what is repeatedly denied, interrupted, or left unsaid. A feeling is dismissed. A cry is silenced. A…
































This is a timely piece, perhaps because the Sakura Festivals have begun in Japan, perhaps because the world is changing in ways that are unpredictable and often violent. The mono no aware applies to the beauty of our own short lives, whose careers, impassioned concerns are swept away by inscrutable notions of time.